How to wean your baby off night feedings?

Averyanova Sveta

Sleeping while feeding is a natural physiological process. The baby is relaxed, happy, full and sleeping. Problems begin when the mother tries to remove the nipple and put the baby in the crib.

As a rule, the baby wakes up and again pulls at the chest. The installation process may take several hours. This is becoming a common problem that needs to be addressed. How to wean a child from falling asleep with the breast painlessly for mother and baby, you will learn in our article.

Why do you need to wean

Most newborns fall asleep holding the breast in their mouth during feeding until they are one year old. This is not scary for the child, but terribly inconvenient for the mother. A woman has to hold the baby in her arms for a long time, freezing in one position, so as not to wake up the whimsical one. As a result, going to bed at night and napping during the day turn into torture for mommy; she becomes nervous, angry, and very tired.

A woman’s negative state affects the atmosphere in the house and the relationships between family members. This is the main reason why you need to wean your child from falling asleep with tits and rather teach him to be independent.

In addition to the above arguments, there are several other reasons that push women to radical measures. But they cannot be called significant:

• The ability to put a child to sleep is necessary for grandmothers and nannies. The baby is capricious without his mother and does not sleep.
• The baby is already big, for example a one-year-old, and the neighbor’s children at this age did not need the breast before bed.

There is no point in doubting that a child should be taught to sleep without a pacifier, bottle or breast.

But everything has its time. For a baby, the breast is a source of warmth, nutrition, and security. This is fine. Start weaning no earlier than 9–10 months.

On a note! The argument that a toddler who falls asleep at the breast after a year necessarily has mental disorders is delusional and fictional. Psychiatrists and neurologists have no basis to confirm these words.

Who is it suitable for?

So, those mothers who do not intend to stop breastfeeding in the near future usually want to teach their child to fall asleep without breastfeeding. This method is suitable for babies who are already a year old or even older. After all, before this period, sucking as a way to calm the nervous system and feel comfort is still very necessary for the child.

The method of falling asleep without breasts will be attractive for those mothers who want to entrust this routine moment to other family members - grandmother, husband. The method is also suitable for those women who want to avoid stress for their child when finishing breastfeeding. After all, sleeping without the mother’s breast gently prepares the baby for the end of breastfeeding.

Causes

If the child falls asleep only when feeding, we can talk about the pathological use of the breast to relieve stress. Emotional instability is provoked by the following factors in a child’s life:

• The baby cannot get a full night's sleep due to illness or colic (up to 6 months).
• Fatigue associated with constant emotional and physical overload.
• Disturbances in sleep and rest patterns due to the mother's fault.
• Period of teething.
• The baby spends little time with his mother: the woman goes to work and often leaves the baby with nannies, grandmothers, and dad. In the evening, the little one does not want to part with his beloved mother, forcing her to stay nearby longer.
• Mothers themselves do not strive to change the ritual of falling asleep: they worry that the babies will not eat their fill and will stop suckling at the breast altogether.

Important! To obtain a positive result from the experiment on weaning oneself from sleeping with the breast in the mouth, it is advisable to exclude from the baby’s life factors that provoke nervousness in the evening and to maintain a daily routine.

How to separate food and sleep

The situation when a child sleeps only with the breast is quite acceptable until the age of one. Then food and sleep need to be separated by time.

At the same time, it is not at all necessary to cancel breastfeeding and switch to a bottle.

To form the right habit, use the following tips:

• Don't miss the moment when your baby falls asleep without breastfeeding one day. This can happen at any age. But usually not earlier than 6 months. Repeat the situation the next day. But don't insist too hard if it doesn't work out right away.
• Spend more time with your child during the day and evening. Satiate your baby with tactile contact, communication, games, kisses.
• Feed not in the bedroom, but in the kitchen. Changing the feeding place and the environment (lights on, loud TV) will have a positive effect on breaking the food=sleep association.
• Shake the baby while sucking, and then hand him over to dad or grandma to rock him to sleep. Let another adult read a book or sing a lullaby.
• If you use the breast to calm you down during crying and moodiness, find another method or reduce the time you spend on the breast during moments of emotional distress.
• Feed your baby 30 minutes before bedtime. For children after 6 months, give kefir, cottage cheese, vegetable and fruit puree at night. Offer breast milk last.

Tracy Hogg Method

To unlearn it, you will need a timer with a signal, such as a bell. For the first time, wait for external signs of fatigue and a desire to go to bed. When your baby starts yawning, go to the bedroom and take your watch with you. Set a timer for 10 minutes, feed your baby until the alarm goes off, and remove the nipple.

Tell your baby it's time to sleep and put him in his crib. Sit with him, pat him on the back, talk. If the baby starts crying, try to calm him down, you can pick him up and walk around the room. The process will take 40–60 minutes. Feeding cannot be started again. The child should fall asleep on his own in his crib.

The next day, give the baby cottage cheese and kefir before bed. Then go to the nursery and set a timer for 4-6 minutes. Repeat the ritual from the previous evening. Do this until the baby lets go of the breast at the signal of the clock on its own and settles down in the crib without hysterics.

Fading

The method is long but effective. The child will wean himself from falling asleep with the breast in his mouth in 1–2 months. The method has another name: “Two steps forward, one step back.” At first, the mother breastfeeds as usual. But for a shorter period, for example 10 minutes. Then he takes the nipple away and reads books, sings songs so that the baby falls asleep. If the baby asks for the breast, you cannot refuse, but you need to delay the moment by entertaining the baby. Gradually, the lullaby will replace breastfeeding at bedtime.

Important! To maintain lactation during the weaning period, it is necessary to express. Pour the milk into a bottle and leave it in the refrigerator for tomorrow.

Learning to fall asleep without breastfeeding

There is no need to stop breastfeeding; you will breastfeed your baby half an hour before your planned bedtime, both during the day and in the evening. Try to avoid feeding your baby at night, delaying this moment until the morning so that the volume of lactation is maintained. For normal healthy sleep of the whole family, it is important to teach the child to fall asleep without sucking, making sure that he gets used to other rituals.

Give your baby more attention early by hugging and kissing him more often and minimizing breast soothing episodes . This preparation will make it easier to wean your baby from sleeping with the breast, and it will be much easier for you to put him to sleep.

Reading

Breastfeed your baby, but don't let him fall asleep with it. Having noticed that the baby is rubbing his eyes, tired and yawning, that is, ready to fall asleep, start reading and gently remove your chest from him. If a child is capricious, do not swear at him; the right thing to do is to talk to him kindly. Pat your child on the head to calm him down, then continue reading again. Accustomed to sleeping with the breast, he will definitely cry; in the first days you will have to give in to him. At the same time, do not mix two activities: you either read a fairy tale or feed. Gradually, your baby will begin to associate reading with falling asleep, he will stop asking you to breastfeed, and you will be able to put him to sleep without feeding.

Music

Feed your baby, put him in the crib or next to you and turn on a soft, pleasant melody. It is better if the songs are without words so that they do not distract the child. When the baby starts asking you for the breast, distract him by paying attention to what a beautiful melody is playing now. Pet or hug your baby so that he feels close to you. If you listen to instrumental music every night with your baby before bed, he will soon get used to this ritual.

Favorite Relatives

You can try to wean your baby from falling asleep while sucking on your breast, with the help of those people to whom the baby is very attached, in addition to you. Ask dad or grandparent to put the baby to sleep without feeding for several days in the afternoon and evening. Their soft stroking, reading stories or hugs will help him fall asleep. If the baby still becomes capricious, you can give in, come into the room and put him to bed in the usual way.

Timer

This technique involves gradually reducing the amount of time your baby suckles at the breast before you put him to bed during the day or evening. Buy a timer with a soft and quiet signal and wait for your child to show signs of fatigue and desire to sleep. On the first evening, set the alarm for 10 minutes. Explain to your baby that when the device rings, he should stop eating. After the signal, go to bed together, stroke the baby so that he feels that you love him and are nearby.

The baby will probably cry, so continue to calm him down, you can even take the baby in your arms and hold him close. He will feel your warmth and gradually stop crying. As soon as you begin to be able to “take away” his breast without hysterics after the bell rings, it will be correct to gradually reduce the time the timer signal is triggered . Replace the calming process with reading, the baby will begin to voluntarily release the breast from his mouth and fall asleep without it while listening to fairy tales. After a while, try reading to your child, avoiding feeding altogether.

Explanation-fairy tale

Children over 2 years old can be tried without breastfeeding with the help of explanations. During the day, constantly say that at night absolutely everyone should sleep, including your chest. During the evening feeding, remind your baby that he will now go to bed, and “boob” is also tired and will rest. At first the child will cry, but you should be there and calm him down. This way he will gradually get used to it and begin to sleep without breastfeeding.

Don’t expect your baby to learn to fall asleep with the breast in a short time; depending on the child’s temperament, this can happen immediately or take several months.

Sometimes, in case of severe hysterics or illness, you will have to take a step back, give in to the baby and put the baby to sleep with the help of feeding, and then gradually begin learning again.

How to wean

To wean a child from sleeping with the breast in his mouth, you need to choose the right time and conditions:

• The baby is 9–12 months old.
• The baby eats complementary foods well (porridge, purees, fermented milk products).
• The baby is healthy and gaining weight normally.
• The child has his own crib; he is not used to sleeping with mom and dad in the same bed.

If the necessary conditions are met, you can begin to form a new habit step by step. There are several ways to solve the problem. Let's talk about the most effective of them.

Feeding 30 minutes before bedtime

Parents' experience shows that early dinner and refusal to suck titi before bedtime are more difficult for children under one year of age to tolerate. Use this method for babies from 12 months.

1. Prepare your child for bed in advance: bathe, change clothes.
2. Let the breast nurse for 10-15 minutes. The child should eat completely.
3. Free your baby's mouth from the nipple before he falls asleep.
4. Talk a little with the baby, play calm games, read a book. You should not entertain your child for a long time so that he can sleep peacefully.
5. After 20–30 minutes, place the baby in the crib and stay close until he falls asleep. Give her a pacifier to calm her down.

Dad's help

Teaching a baby to sleep without a breast is easier if the parent has nothing to take out from under his shirt. Dads don't have to restrain themselves; turn to them for help. Fathers need to take over mom's duties for a few days. Going to bed will look like this:

1. Mom feeds the baby 30 minutes before bedtime and leaves the room, or better yet, the apartment. Now dad remains the main nanny.
2. He prepares the baby for bed: bathes, dresses.
3. He carries the little one to the nursery and puts him in the crib.
4. He sits next to him, reads books, sings lullabies or rocks his daughter and son in his arms.
5. You need to react calmly to screams and hysterics. You can let your baby drink from a bottle or offer a pacifier.

New ritual

When a child could sleep with the breast in his mouth, he developed his own ideas about sleep and going to bed: mom gives breastfeeding and I sleep peacefully. Now these associations need to be destroyed. Create a new ritual and follow it every evening. You can take the following set of actions as an example:

• The baby ate well before going to bed: sucked the breast, drank kefir, ate cottage cheese.
• He was put to bed.
• Mom turned on the night light and sat down next to her.
• She gently stroked the baby's back and sang several songs.
• When the child falls asleep on his own, without titi, gradually stop feeding him at night. Replace breasts with a water bottle.

On a note! The set of actions for the evening ritual depends on the baby’s temperament and his preferences. In addition to reading, you can use massage, hugs with your favorite toy, rocking in a cradle.

Cardinal method

Suitable for children aged one and a half years. At this age, there is really no need to sleep holding your chest:

• Breast milk does not play a big role in the baby's development, growth and weight gain.
• Evening and night sucking is necessary as a bad habit, a ritual.

The child urgently needs to be taught to be alone in the crib, without his mother’s tit. To do this quickly, you can use the following measures:

1. Give the child an overnight stay to grandparents. The baby will have to stay with them for several days. Relatives need to be patient - the child will cry and wait for the mother to go to bed.
2. There is also a ritual of going to sleep during the day. Grandmothers should read, rock the whimsy in their arms, sing lullabies, and distract with toys.
3. When mom returns from the “trip” and takes the baby home, you need to remain tough and follow the new rules. Under no circumstances agree to have your breasts pulled out. On the first day, the baby, of course, is naughty, but then he will understand that a new “adult stage” of life has arrived and he needs to be independent.

A few more tips

Weaning from sleeping on the chest is a difficult moment not only for the child, but also for the mother. It will be easier to cope with emotional stress if you follow a few more rules:

• The biggest problem for a child when he refuses to suck titi before bed is fear. The baby feels lonely, abandoned, unprotected. Give him the opportunity to feel your love in a different way: press him to your body more often during the day, in the evening, play more, kiss.
• Do not remove the breast in front of your baby unless you intend to offer titya to him. Wear closed shirts and sweaters in the evening so as not to provoke the baby’s desire to ask for the breast.
• Be prepared for setbacks. Today the baby calmly fell asleep without sucking, and tomorrow he will be hysterical, demanding a tit. Don’t be nervous, don’t swear, the baby is testing your strength of character. Stand your ground until the end. Over time, there will be fewer hysterics.

I have an opinion! The duration and complexity of the process of weaning from sleeping with the breast directly depends on the age of the baby. It’s much easier to do this in one and a half to two years.